Once again summer is flying by and as I glance through pictures and remember things I notice that once again I have forgotten to hand off my camera. I have forgotten to ask someone to take a picture of me with my kids...funny how moms have to ask others to take the pictures. Which takes the natural and spontaneous moment and stomps on it...because you unnaturally pose and are then frustrated with how it looks...because you tried. It makes you feel silly, so then you just skip it.
But we do want our children to see us. It would be a gift to have someone follow me around and capture me in the everyday...flipping pancakes, while pouring juice, turning on a cartoon, and finding a red marker....while maybe answering the phone or email...AND taking a picture of something.
Maybe that would be my niche...not photographer, but lady who is your shadow and captures your everyday (right, Katie!).
Yesterday, I read this post. And her words gave me peace. She said,
"I am in every picture I take. I am the reason these photos even exist. Just because you can't see my face doesn't mean that I am not there. I felt the moment, captured it, I was there. That is me. The mom is in the picture. Of course I want my kids to have photographic evidence of their mother through the years, and they do, and will.
They also have all my words, a more accurate reflection of me than any photo could ever be."
Once someone sadly said to me, "Do you really think your kids will read your whole blog?"
I have no idea if they ever will. But I will say, that if my mom (or Ed' mom) had blogged (which she totally would have if it had been around back then). I would TOTALLY read it. Over and over. Everyday I wish I could see her in the everyday of our younger years...and know how she managed our middle school and teen years.
Maybe my kids won't give a hoot, but either way, my voice is here.
And even if I'm not in many pictures physically...
I am. I am behind the camera. Snapping the pictures.
There for the car washes, cookie baking, fishing at the cottage...I am there.
I am there pouring juice, applying bandaids, folding clothes, making lunches.
I am there.