Saturday, March 5, 2011
I got to have my mom here for a full week recently. She came of course to see Sydney and the boys but she also came to help out me, a new mom of three, while my better half was away on business. She flew in Tuesday night and flew out on Tuesday night. Her flight cost $88 which was a huge steal at the end of the week because the gas prices really took off. ugh.
The first day was jam packed with ski lessons, Henry's class, and setting up Charley's learning fair project. Thursday was also pretty full with the science/learning festival and Charley's destination imagination after school activity.
The rest of the visit was more laid back. We survived the three kiddos together and worked well as a team. While we were in the trenches my mom kept saying she didn't think she was helping enough. While we were in the trenches of the week I know I got snappy. She listened to me do my mothering thing and she is always so supportive and good about listening to me do things my crazy way. She never makes me feel judged or silly about my parenting choices.
So the week flew by, especially with the exciting visit of my sister and her family. And as I drove my mom to the airport I got my lump in my throat and she and I reflected on the week. We agreed we worked together well. Everyone seemed pretty happy and relaxed all week. We got good sleep. We ate well. We didn't spend much money. Etc. My mom once again said she didn't think she really did enough. I insisted she did plenty and that I really appreciated her time.
We dropped her off and amazingly I held it together Tuesday night. I usually fall apart. It wasn't until Wednesday morning that it all hit the fan. Once again I was doing this mothering thing all by myself. I actually had the all day help while Ed was gone. So Wednesday morning plenty of tears were shed.
What hit me...
When I came downstairs to two boys who were disagreeing over some Lego thing I thought, it was so nice that my mom was down here right off the bat to keep things happy.
Then I looked in the kitchen and saw last nights dinner dishes heaped on the counter. And I thought, man it was nice that my mom unloaded and loaded the dishes all week.
And then I turned the corner and the laundry baskets were once again taking up residence on the couches and I remembered looking over at my mom playing games and folding laundry at the same time all week.
And then it was time to get out the door and not only did I have to get Charley out the door with the school gear, but I had to also get Henry's shoes on, nurse Sydney, and get my own boots on.
At Henry's class Miss Sydney decided she wanted to be awake so I had to hold her while also playing play dough and trains. Man, it was nice to have my mom here to help with one or the other of the kiddos...or sip a yummy coffee in route to Henry's class.
Arriving home I had to once again nurse Sydney while also greeting Charley from his school day and make lunch. I thought, man it was nice to have mom here to do the lunch thing as a team.
So not only did my mom keep me company and put up with my often times snappy snotty daughter attitude...she kept me sane.
She let me enjoy the week. She let me enjoy being a mom of three.
She folded laundry, played with the boys, made meals, cleaned up meals, drove carpool, walked Charley to school, grocery shopped, put the boys to bed, gave naps, changed almost all of Sydney's diapers, held Sydney, answered the phone, helped get us to ski lessons, helped us make it to the science fest, bought us lunch and other treats, took the boys on an outing so I could have some quiet, let me do my computer stuff, and more.
Being a mom is tough. Being a mom when your husband is away is even harder ( I have so much respect for the single moms out there or the moms who have husbands in the military or jobs that take them away often). Being a mom with your own mom is a gift. And I am so glad I got that time to be myself as a daughter, woman, and a mother with my own mom. I appreciate doing my thing while with the person who inspires me and is my role model.
Thanks mom for giving up your time. Giving us your energy. I know it is a lot. We love you.