Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Becoming a Big Brother...

Hit play while you read this post.  I came across this song and fell in love. Hard.  And now when I play it, too many times a day, the boys chime in and Charley bolts over to wherever Sydney is relaxing and sings it to her. 

Amazingly, I think I sound on key when I sing along to this - which I know I don't.  But it is like back in the day when I would sing to Wilson Phillips...doesn't everyone sound great singing along with them. 

Back to the post...hit play and enjoy.

This little girl was born....

and two young men became big brothers.

Many of you have been inquiring about the boys and how they are doing as big brothers to their little sister.  Charley is a pro of course.  Only once has he pushed it when he picked her up to hand to me when I was turned away dealing with something else.  Other than that he is once again the gentle big brother that he naturally became when Henry was born. 

Henry, on the other hand, is a different little boy. 

And though most of you know him as a shy, tender, quiet little being.  He is a corker and is a different boy here at our house.  He instigates a lot at our house.  He pests his big brother.  He is testing Ed and I HUGE these days.  But he is my snuggle bug who loves his big brother soooo much that it almost scares me at times.  I want him to be confident in the world as his own person.  He also loves his little sister.  This I know.  He is intrigued by her.  He is worried about her when she cries.  He wants to know where she is.  She is drawn to her and wants to be close....VERY. CLOSE.

Here lies the problem.  He wants to be so close that he feels the need to get his face right up close.  He is fascinated by her face and wants to touch each little feature.  And I explain that they are delicate and he needs to be gentle but even with me sitting right there he has to make a fist and give her a little pound in the arm.  He laughs about hitting her head - even though he doesn't.  He challenges me by going at her when I am sitting right there explaining how little and precious she is.  He cries immediately when I tell him he is being too rough or mean.  I know he knows.  I just don't think he has the control or the realization that she is so precious.

This morning at Henry's class the mom discussion began with our joys and concerns sharing time.  I shared my concern that Henry is too rough with her.  And once again I was inspired by the moms in the group.  One mom pointed out something her child's pediatrician said to her when her second was born.  Something along the lines of...we as parents are here to protect this little miracle and that includes protecting him/her from his/her older siblings.  Not because they are intentionally out to hurt the new little baby in the house - but because at the age of 2 or 3...they just don't know.  They don't understand how rough they can be with their touch or how dangerous some action could be on a baby. 

Now friends and family - do not fret.  Ed and I have been aware of Henry's love for Sydney and his lack of understanding and are not letting him alone in a room with her.  Charley also understands, has witnessed, and protects his little sister from his little brother.  We are working with Little Hank to understand what it means to be a big brother to a baby sister.  I just don't think he gets that she is NOT ready to wrestle. 

Because as you can see from this picture...that is what he wants to do with her. For over 20 minutes he laid down at her feet and let her kick him. He giggled and she had her legs going crazy wild.

 And I have no doubt that she will take him down someday.  She already has her hands up ready to defend.

He loves her. You can see it. He just needs to learn. And he is learning each day.


Barb said...

I'm first! Ahhhhhh Love the song and the post and how special Henry is as a big bro to his little sis!

Raina and Andy said...

i'm obsessed with the song. i love it. i love this post. so real. down to earth. so honest. so true. and so much love. i still can't believe this little being is here with us. and i think with time it will wear off for henry too but that pediatrician is right and also he doesn't know how to control all his emotions: excitement, confusion, jealousy, love just like any man....haha!!!! go hen go. you're perfect. :) and syd-you are SO darn tough. i oughta know...a "3rd" and a girl-you will amaze your brothers. love, RR

Beth said... sweet! brings back so many memories! allyssa would bite katie, if i left the room. i was mortified; but in the end they are very good to each other and neither needs to know that wasn't always the case!!

Grandma Charlie said...

I love everything about this post! Have been thinking about those big brothers alot, and what a picture you have given of the new love in Henry's life. Can't wait to see all 3 of them.

Anonymous said...

I love all of the pictures - they are both soooo cute! I also love the song (did you know Jewel is pregnant?)! It is nice relating to your 3 year old because mine is very similar. Amber loves Evelyn dearly, but can get pretty rough w/ her at times and I can't really leave them in the same room together. In fact, yesterday Amber kicked Evelyn in the stomach (not that hard, but made her cry) when Evelyn was standing up on furniture. She had to go in the corner for that one!!! Jamie Trampe

Danifred said...

*tears* I just love it.


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