The holidays have passed...well not New Years...but Henry and I spent a quiet hour yesterday taking down our Christmas tree and other decorations. It was an hour I found filled me with grace. I am starting to feel anxious that I am not ready for this baby to arrive...even though physically I am starting to feel more than ready. I had high expectations for this chunk of time (Sept-Jan). I had planned on concentrating on giving Henry and I a chance to enjoy the mornings just him and I. I think we have...but there is so much I had wanted to fit in with him that we haven't gotten to do. I still have a few weeks with just Henry in the morning and I am determined to relish it. Baby number three is going to arrive all to soon and even though I am trying to tell myself to relax and enjoy these next couple weeks with Charley and Henry, I am finding myself lying awake around 3am worried that I haven't absorbed life with two enough.
Today for instance we headed to the zoo with friends (a pro mom of three girls).
And she shared that she is enjoying having her first grade daughter home this week. She misses it...since first grade means all day school. I am truly enjoying the stimulation that half day kindergarten is giving Charley. It gives Henry and I just enough time to get something done and the boys have wonderful afternoons (most of the time). It has really been a blessing for our day. But it is hitting me that next year Charley will go for a whole day and both Henry and I are going to miss him. It is when you hang out with friends and absorb what they are saying that you are gifted with a realization that makes you stop and smell the roses...and for the rest of the week and school year and summer I am going to relish the yummy brotherly afternoons and the chance to enjoy all my children for half the day!
With Charley and Henry living without naps - I am feeling overwhelmed with how I am going to recooperate from the birth and catch up during those first few months when baby is waking all too often for the cuddly nursing time - all. night. long. I know that for a while there will be a few more cartoons, wii games, and movies in the afternoon. But keeping my moods even, my sanity under control, and my patience present....has me unable to sleep lately.
Yet, I am so excited to start our new routine, meet this new little one, see Henry turn into a big brother, snuggle this new little heartbeat, and find out what we name this little he or she.
Today at the zoo, Charley noticed that there is a new penguin exhibit coming this July! I pointed out that baby will be able to see the penguin exhibit and come July, he or she will be able to sit up in the stroller and take it in! Crazy!
Time is flying. Life keeps plugging along. These next couple weeks will be filled with moments of anticipation, exhilaration, excitement, and anxiety. And that is what life is all about.
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4 comments:
Still love your blog, just haven't had a chance to read many for a while. I totally can relate to your feeling a panic to fit it all in and give each child one on one quality time. Don't worry too much, sounds like your doing a great job and it will all be OK. Good luck w/ your baby. :)
eeeeeeeeeeeee! can't wait for that little "he or she". love the first picture on your blog. you all look great. RR
I am wondering if I even combed my hair yesterday?
Your are going to do great with 3, your a good mommy!
What an exciting time for you and for the boys. And yes, you are correct, time just keeps flying by.
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