Sunday, April 5, 2009

A present and a reminder to live in the present

I enjoy reading other mommy blogs and books on being a mom to motivate me, give me perspective, and remind me to appreciate the ups and downs of this journey. One of the blogs I read is dooce.com. Her blog can sometimes be in your face. But I love it. She just came out with a book and she had a book thing at a book store near my sister-in-laws house near Chicago. I pointed out this blog to her and she noticed this book gig by her house. And guess what! She went, she listened to Heather read a passage from the book, speak of her experience, and then she got in line, bought a book and had it signed To Sarah! It was a really thoughtful thing. It was one of the most thoughtful things someone has done for me in a long time. It was a surprise and it totally made my day. Becca could ask my mom about what I carried around the rest of that day. I just kept picking it up and saying, "I can't believe she thought of me and got it signed for me!" So thank you Becca. I am truly enjoying the book. It is great. And I will pass it along to Becca and my sister soon!

I have also been reading another book, What Every Mom Needs by Elisa Morgan and Carol Kuykendall, that had a few quotes in it that hit home. I find myself struggling lately with Charley. The question he asks most often is, "Will you play with me?" He asks it so often that it kind of drives me nuts. If he would come and ask me, "mom, wanna play ____?" It would not be so much of a whine but an invitation. He is at a tough age. He wants to play pretend which is awesome but it is hard as his mama to do this all the time.
Play a game - I am in!
Do an art project - yes!
Puzzle - for sure!
Build something - heck ya!
Race some cars - bring it on!
But play house....play spy....play camping....not so much. Sorry buddy. Part of the problem is that when I try to do these things I don't get it right and I am told how to play it right and that is hard.

I also struggle finding time to get the laundry done, house picked up, meals made, and other little jobs done. This book reminded me that some days, it isn't worth worrying about the cleaning, laundry, and little things. If Ed gets home and the house looks a little dismantled and I haven't showered - I shouldn't stress. Instead I know he will know that his boys had a great day.

The quotes from the book that struck me on pages 168 and 169:

"These are the best days of your life. Enjoy them because they pass to quickly." This stage of mothering young children is a stage. It only feels like an era. And it will pass. It will not last forever. It will end one day. When we accept the myth that the best we can do is simply, "grin and bear it", we miss out on what mothering can mean. While we are wishing ourselves the next season, we miss the good stuff that is happening right now.....

This week we have the opportunity to get on the floor and build block towers. This is the season when you are invited to read, to play, to imagine, to dream! Your lap is the "favorite-est place to be." Your smile is more valuable than money. Your words mean more than those on the television, in a magazine, or in a classroom. Savor the moments of this season that will never come around again.

We tend to keep waiting for life to get better when, really, it just gets different. If the grass looks greener on the other side of your fence, it may be because you're not investing your time and energy in your own grass. Live in the present!"

So this week my goal is to be patient and take in the moments that we journey through. And realize that there is no one else in the world but my two little guys who think I make the world go round. Heck, I head out to the mailbox to get the mail and Henry watches me go out the door, and he panics and starts to cry, and makes his way to the door. By the time I get the mail and turn around and head back he is now watching me closely. And as he realizes that I have returned from my 20 second journey to the mailbox his face explodes into a smile and he squeals with delight! I am lucky to be loved by these two little gentlemen. And I hope they know how much I love them.

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